“Dear Mr. President, Please Wait to Bomb Iran Until My Friends Leave”
Dear Mr. President,
Please wait to bomb Iran until my friends leave.
Right now, some religious peace activist folks are doing something you, Condi, Dick and others in your administration obviously could never do – they are in Iran, talking to Iranians. Here, you can learn more about this delegation, and another scheduled for early March. Surely you can wait a few weeks ‘til these folks, friends and colleagues of mine, leave Iran before you concoct the provocation necessary to begin shocking and aweing Iran, yes?
Fess up now, you didn’t think it would be this easy to start another war after the way you did Iraq, did you? Hell, you didn’t even think you’d still be in office! Surely you must have thought you’d have long ago been impeached and removed from office for your perfidy in deceiving the country into a war (not to mention your criminally neglectful reaction to Hurricane Katrina).
So getting to start another war – your third! Nixon could only dream of doing what you are doing! — is icing on the cake for you guys, isn’t it? Good thing there are no cameras in your private meetings with Cheney, Rice and the gang where you roll on the floor and laugh yourselves silly over what you are getting away with, yes?
You are shocked Condi is still Secretary of State, no? After she blew off Iran’s offer of broad negotiations in 2003? Good thing she circular-filed that one, almost blew your plans to attack Iran, a country that hasn’t invaded another country in 250 years (I know, it’s hard for you to go 25 months without attacking somebody).
And Cheney, jeez, telling a U.S. Senator, on the floor of the Senate, to go f— himself, shooting his friend in the face and leaving it up to others to disclose the incident, blowing off Congress over questions about his secret oil-and-gas-interest-laden “energy task force”, saying that waterboarding is “a no-brainer”, good thing he’s on your side! Good thing he picked himself to be your running mate back in 2000, eh?
As far as the media, did you have any idea how easy it would be to play them like a fiddle? Again? In order to start another war? I’m surprised you don’t call them and say “guys, c’mon, this is too easy, make it a little challenging for me at least, put up some resistance. Point out my current denials we are planning to attack Iran are just like those we issued on Iraq in 2002 – c’mon guys, you know how to Google, don’tcha? Maybe point out that Iran is years away from having nuclear weapons while we still have over 10,000 and Israel has several hundred, that Ahmadenijad is not really in charge of nuclear or foreign policy, that it’s really Saudi-funded Sunni groups doing the damage in Iraq, that the briefers on Iran’s alleged meddling in Iraq wouldn’t even allow themselves to be identified? C’mon, something, anything? Oh never mind, go back to Brittany Spears’ shaved head, it’s better you not bother yourself, another war will be great for selling papers and jacking up cable news viewership.”
Heck, the media didn’t even make you pay a price for telling those seven year-olds to stop making peace signs at the YMCA day care center ten days ago, did they? (Whew, that was a close one, good thing they were so distracted with the Anna Nicole Smith story.)
And the Democrats, Reid, Pelosi and crew, in control of Congress now? Admit it, you have not lost one minute of sleep worrying about them stopping you from attacking Iran, have you? Not with them tied up in knots trying to prove they are “strong on defense” and they “support the troops” in Iraq by continuing to vote to spend our tax dollars on an unwinnable quagmire instead of bringing them home to the warm embrace of their families. Shoot, them Dems are afraid of their own shadows, aren’t they? Even when they “control Congress?” C’mon, you can admit it, Mr. President, it’s a little more fun now than when you had your Rubberstamplican buddies in charge of the Congress, ain’t it?
The best thing about this whole deal, if I may be presumptive here, is everybody thinks you are a dunce, instead of the figurehead of the most ruthless wielders of executive power since, gosh I don’t know, Stalin maybe? You and your posse are great understanders that it matters not one wit how historically unpopular you or your policies are, you can continue to do whatever you want – escalate the war in Iraq, attack Iran, maybe even with nucular weapons (in order to stop them from getting nucular weapons – brilliant!) – unless and until you are stopped by impeachment and removal from office, or Congress cutting off funding for the war, or massive war tax resistance, or a huge non-violent general strike that shuts down DC, or even the most likely, hell freezing over. Heck, Congress can’t even get itself together to pass a non-binding resolution against, not the Iraq war itself, but the escalation of the war. Jon Stewart had it right; the Constitution isn’t even binding to you. Stalin would be proud, maybe jealous even.
So I know it’s too much for you to ask to not bomb Iran, when you so easily can.
All I ask, Mr. President, is one tiny little favor – please wait ‘til my friends leave.
But hang on a minute. It’s not just the friends I previously mentioned. The people of Iran are my friends, too. Here are some pictures of them.
So, you know what, please don’t bomb them either.
Kevin Martin is Executive Director of Peace Action and the Peace Action Education Fund. Peace Action, which is celebrating its 50th anniversary this year, is the country’s largest peace and disarmament organization with 100,000 members. www.peace-action.org .
Published on Tuesday, February 27, 2007 by CommonDreams.org